Recently someone reminded me that I should really talk about the power of ‘NO’.
The word often conjures up a stern ‘Nurse Ratchet’ type figure with her hair in a bun so tight that it cuts off circulation to the logical side of the brain. I’m here to tell you that it has amazing power for good as well!!
I could go on and on with the virtues of saying ‘no’, but sufficed to say that it works to control kids, gain respect, set boundaries and gain friends. It’s true… read on.
I’ve worked with a lot of people who consider themselves “people pleasers”. These are the types of folks who are so in need of friends that they are willing to do almost anything to gain friends. I’ve heard of teenagers hold drugs for people or cover up for others when they know its wrong just so they can gain friends. Others are willing to bake entire meals for a party so the host can invite them next time and give them praise. In other instances, some people are just trying to use you and you need to say ‘no’ consistently enough times for them to get the message.
In kids, saying ‘no’ creates a boundary for them. It shows them what you expect from them rightly or wrongly. Letting kids get their way on everything does nothing for them, it doesn’t help them learn or grow. How many times have you watched a “behind the scenes” documentary on kid celebrities after they’ve hit rehab for the 10th time? What do they typically say?
“No one ever told me no”.
Now, let’s be honest. I’m not saying you get to go around and say ‘no’ to everything. You need to also say ‘yes’, but what I want for you to do is to be extremely judicious with both of those words. What are trying to solve with each ‘yes’ and ‘no’.
I’m rooting for you,